I can't stand my daughter's boyfriend.  I really, really can't stand this kid.  They've been together just over a year and he's extremely controlling and emotionally abusive.  He's even got her convinced she has no friends (she's very popular in school... the favorite for next year's football and wrestling cheerleading captain).  I used to like the kid... that was before Katie broke up with him a couple months ago and he started stalking her.  She ended up taking him back because whatever... she's 16... what's the reasoning??  I have no idea. 

I'm trying very hard to concentrate on NOT putting him down because then she feels the need to defend him.  I'd rather kill him with kindness but it's so hard to bite my tongue when I can't even be in the same room with him.  I literally have to leave the room when he comes to the house.  I know that the more I fight her, the closer they're going to get.... her words are "no one has to understand... only us"... the last thing I want to do is make this any more romantic for her.  I don't want to alienate her either.  It's just so frustrating that she won't open her eyes to the reality of what life would be like with him.

Right now... at this point in time... I've basically decided to concentrate on her, on how much we love her and hoping she remembers that no matter what happens and what choices she makes, we'll always be there for her.